Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Wednesday just say no to abuse cambaign!!

ok... I feel like today is a reality check Wednesdays for the ladies of the world (or maybe just for my three readers..lol).. Seriously, a student kills his ex-girlfriend by repeatedly shaking and banging her head against a wall!!! Wow... My skin crawls to think about it. The nerve of a kid, waiving his miranda rights to describe in detail what took place. To me, that's sick and twisted!! It reminds me of a murder investigation show that didn't last long (it was hella cool so it should've). In the show crime scene thrill seakers teamed up and reinvestigated a real case, fake crime scene and all. In this particular case the murderer entered his neighbor's house, raped and tourched the place, only to reassert himself in the investigation and claim to be the hero. He was caught when he let a very important detail slip".. I couldn't sleep all night when I saw that , talk about narcissistic!!.. Back to my point.. How in the hell do people not know that their man is in-FREAKIN-sane!! Jay and I discussed this very subject this morning.

Me: "Babe I would know!! I'm telling you, I would!"
Him: "No dear, they say that a person can fool you for up to 6 months"

Really, I think to myself sadly...

I think in another life I was a prosecutor for this very issue. I remember once in high school in my Criminology mock trial being the defendant of a woman who killed her husband in self defense. Our stance was that she had battered woman's syndrome. I stayed up nights, researching and studying the case, trying to give my client the best defense possible. It seemed like breathing wasn't important at that time, life was this case! In class, I would get up and object so much the prosecutor could not speak and the class would cheer!! Remembering this I wish I could account this all to me being extremely smart. And while I am that (:-)), I know that my passion in that moment was the same passion that prevents me from lending a hand in organizations that protect women against abuse: I'm afraid I'll Lorena Bobbit on some ass!!


Me: "Nope, nope, no babe! The guy wouldn't last a second date! I would know. I just don't see how someone could not know. It's in the way he talks, it's in the stories he tells. It's all about control. I would see someone trying to be controlling"..
Him: "You're right it's all about control. Ok Spank, maybe you could tell. Most people aren't that perceptive. They just don't see the clues"

I can not bear that women are out there being abused. Mentally or physically. Emotionally it tears me up inside to think someone has so little self-worth that they don't just make a move. A move away from the situation, but more importantly a move to talk to someone. Let me tell you my three friends, NO man will EVER be worth that suffering. As a beautiful woman - and beautiful you are - you have in you the ability to move mountains!! Take a step, however small, but please STEP!


P.S. And as a public service announcement I've gathered the biggest signs that you're in an abusive relationship:

-is jealous or possessive towards you.
-tries to control you by being very bossy or demanding.
-tries to isolate you by demanding you cut off social contacts and friendships.
-is violent and/or loses his or her temper quickly.
-presses you sexually, demands sexual activities you are not comfortable with.
-abuses drugs or alcohol.
-claims you are responsible for his or her emotional state.
-blames YOU when he or she mistreats you.
-has a history of bad relationships.
-your family and friends have warned you about the person or told you that they are concerned for your safety or emotional well being.
-you frequently worry about how he or she will react to things you say or do.
-makes "jokes" that shame, humiliate, demean or embarrass you, weather privately or around family and friends.
-your partner grew up witnessing an abusive parental relationship and/or was abused as a child. -you leave and then return to your partner repeatedly, against the advice of your friends, family and loved ones.

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