I love you mommy, I sobbed through tears!

For anyone who knows me, I absolutely HATE Mother's Day! Now don't get me wrong, love my mom, respect all the mothers out there, but any childless woman past the age of 25 knows that on Mother's Days the questions/statements start rollin..

When is it your turn?
Are you and your man contemplating?
This is the LAST year I'm buying you a gift without you being a mom. You better be knocked up next year (thanks titi, love ya too!!)
Maybe you should consider adoption?
You're like a 2nd mom to the kids

Or worse yet is the big production of your 8 neices/nephews who march single-file line to deliver a card and a gift! Each name perfectly spelled out in the sweetest card, or scribbled in the earnest of efforts!!!.. Ok that is just painstakingly precious, but when you are an emotional waterfall like me when it comes to all things family and you break out in tears, you'd understand why that would simultaneously be like slow burning torture!

Sweet, loving, kind, generous ALL of it! (And definitely the brain child of my mother). Let's now add the words horrible, annoying, confusing, embarassing, and talk about pressure!!

So needless to say this year I was quite happy to be out of town in Dallas for most of the day. When I arrived back at noon I honestly contemplated pretending my flight got delayed a few hours. But like the responsible and dutiful daughter I am, I promptly called to find out the agenda.

Dragging my feet I drove to my mother's. So disillusioned that I forgot the gift and had to go back home. I drove, telling myself I would stop by Walgreens and pick up a card. However mind still mentally preparing, I completely overlooked it...

Cut to yesterday, May 12th.. Feeling bad and like I had been completely unspirited I called my mom.

"What you doing?" I asked shyly.
"Just watching tv and cooking" she says.
"Oh, how was your day?" I stall..
"Ok"
"Good.... So listen mom, I just realized I did not get you a Mother's Day card. I'm sorry!"
"Oh dear, you don't have to get me a card"...
"I know mom, it's just I was thinking about you the other day when I had my book club party. I found the little spreading knives you gave me and I realized you're just the most considerate person I know". Tears starting to flow... "I really think you're the most giving, caring person I know... I remember back in high school whenever I needed something I'd come home and it was on my bed... I find myself doing that with Jay always anticipating his needs and I think I get that from you. I'm really lucky to have you. I love you" now completely sobbing..
"Well I'm happy to do it while I'm here and I can. Thank you dear, it's really nice to hear." "Are you okay, are you on your period?"..
Laughing out loud "Yes mom but I just wanted to make sure you knew how much I appreciate you.... I guess it's more difficult saying the words than just writing it in a card".
"I know. I really like to hear it though. It means a lot!"
"Ok mom. Well I just wanted to call and say that.. I will let you get back to what you were doing".
"Ok dear, thank you, I love you."
"I love you too mom!!"

I hang up the phone feeling silly, emotional, happy to have caused a smile, and loved!!! I exhale... as much as I hate Mother's Day,I realize what a completely special day it is. To honor the one person who, if your lucky, has bandaged your cuts, and thought about you when you didn't think of yourself. Who always knew and fostered your potential, and allowed you to grow into an independant and happy adult. This is the person who has loved, more than anything, the role she has had in your life as your mother. How then can you blame her, or anyone else for that matter, for wanting to extend that same joy and pleasure to their most treasured child..

So with a new attitude I say to all "Happy Mother's Day!". It's all about you... However when it comes to me, just leave me the hell alone!! LOL...